“ The Insecurity ” ~ of the unforgiving ~


One hears said

That time heals all,

Yet we begrudge

An inapposite call,

Aim want revenge

Wouldst seal a wall,

To fix such barrier

Placates the insecure,

Till finds hereafter

They’ll ne’er recall,

What matter caused

Merits unforgiving,

So as to shrivel mind

Lugubriously small,

To harbour ill feelings

Between we brothers

Or friends made fall!


10 thoughts on ““ The Insecurity ” ~ of the unforgiving ~

  1. Powerful!! My great aunt had a saying, “I will forgive, but I won’t forget.” I have often wondered whether the “forget” was a way to safeguard against future incidences or whether there is, in truth, an act of forgiveness when the memory lingers (even festers). I especially like how you introduced an assessment into the process, that we must reflect and not overreact.

    “The matter or cause
    Merits unforgiving,”

    • Thank you my friend. Ah dear Rebecca, the wisdom of the female, forgives but does not forget. The male not so wise, forgets but doesn’t forgive. But in a way it sort of works out, because forgetting suggests he can’t remember what it was he needed to forgive, ergo problem solved!

      Kidding aside, my point on the subject, in essence, is that unforgiving, as in holding a grudge sometimes for a lifetime, in my life’s experience usually occurs with insecure people who accordingly are unable to forgive themselves either. It is by contrast, also my experience that people who are secure and comfortable about themselves are inclined to overlook, and accept human emotional reactions, and the resulting misinterpretations that can occur. This allows to deal with potentially negative issues without destroying valued or cherished relations. They are the people, whom as you suggest, can reflect and not overreact. Sad for the numerous, insecure, who cannot do either.

      Again welcome back. It is a good feeling to be hearing from you again. Jean-Jacques

  2. I think most don’t really understand forgiveness and they think it’s some kind of emotion when in fact it’s simply letting go and moving on. What I harbor about someone else only poisons my insides. Once I see that and if possible let it go, then I’ve forgiven. But the mind doesn’t forget and the thought arises with all the human emotion and reactions back in force. The real trick for me, and my best is most, is not reattaching to the emotion and identifying with it but seeing it as separate from my heart/core. I love this poem. Happy approaching weekend to you, Marianne, and your fur babies.

    • Thank you Paulette! And yes, I agree with your thought that most do not understand the meaning of forgiveness, and often apply its ultimate principle where it does not apply. As I see it, unforgivingly holding a grudge because of a misunderstanding, is the reaction of insecure individuals. Insecure people who are unable to deal with the possibility of they’re having to loose face by they being the ones who have need to make amends, with the uncertainty of their action or stance on a given issue.

      And a happy weekend to you all as well. Jean-Jacques Fournier

  3. “To be wrong is human, to forgive is divine…” I cannot remember who wrote this quote but I think forgiveness helps ourselves more than the forgiven person. Therefore, it is more overcoming resentment against the offender . It allows us to live more free, to go further instead of living in hatred or without bearing a grudge.

      • Thank you, Paulette. I could only think of this quote in French: “Errer est humain, pardonner divin” . Now, you have reminded me the author, I can quote him properly “To err is human; to forgive, divine”

    • Excellent point with which I agree completely, and absolutely doable but difficult objective to achieve in spite of the benefits , for the average so called human, who has lived in a society of an eye for an eye etc for a few thousand years. Who will lead the leaders that set the example, who in turn will lead us in that wonderful world in which I want to live, if only for a day, before I am no longer? Jean-Jacques

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